


We Built this House On Memories

by illustriousprotagonist



Category: Panic! at the Disco
Genre: F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-18
Updated: 2016-01-18
Packaged: 2018-05-14 16:54:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 434
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5750929
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/illustriousprotagonist/pseuds/illustriousprotagonist
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After Ryan had left the band, post-fighting with Brendon, Brendon felt lost. He might’ve been the frontman, but Ryan had kept him together. He kept him whole. Without Ryan, Brendon felt like the yin without the yang; Brendon was the passive and negative force, and Ryan was the active and positive force. With his absence, Brendon was a broken, angry, destructive force. Everyone in the band had noticed this negative change, and they all had bounced out, one by one.<br/>“I don’t need them,” he said. “I don’t need them.”</p>
            </blockquote>





	We Built this House On Memories

He missed him. 

No, “missed him” would be an understatement. 

He wept for him every night. Brendon called Ryan almost every night, but he never answered. With every passing day, Brendon fell deeper and deeper into his little facade of happy faces he puts on. He longed for those midnight caresses and sweet nothings only lovers spoke. Every nightfall, Brendon had reached over to the side of the bed where Ryan used to lie and lightly touched the cool, empty sheets. His faint touches became angry punches. He usually awoke to a wet pillow and stronger longing than the day before.

After Ryan had left the band, post-fighting with Brendon, Brendon felt lost. He might’ve been the frontman, but Ryan had kept him together. He kept him whole. Without Ryan, Brendon felt like the yin without the yang; Brendon was the passive and negative force, and Ryan was the active and positive force. With his absence, Brendon was a broken, angry, destructive force. Everyone in the band had noticed this negative change, and they all had bounced out, one by one. 

“I don’t need them,” he said. “I don’t need them.”

And then he met Sarah. Sarah changed his life, and he quickly fell in love with her. However, no matter how much he tried to forget about Ryan, there was always a nagging thought in the back of his mind. 

He got married, and still no words from Ryan. He loved Sarah, maybe as much as he loved Ryan. 

Finally, it was his chance to write the outro song for the Death of a Bachelor album. He wrote it very indirectly, hoping no one would figure out who it was about.  _ Impossible Year  _ was about his relationship with Ryan. He poured his heart out into this song. As soon as he released it, a lot of people were worried about Brendon’s wellbeing. 

“Who hurt you, Brendon bby?” asked one.

“Probably Ryan Ross,” replied another. This just made him angry, and a little horrified. Had everyone figured him out so quickly? 

His Twitter blew up with questions about Ryan and the album. Brendon quickly lost it, shutting himself off from social media and his friends. Sarah was worried as he locked himself in the studio, not coming out for hours at a time. He would write destructive songs, sometimes throwing things and shattering glass casings.

And then he got a call.

From Ryan. 

Brendon picked up the call, expecting to hear nothing but staggering silence. He was sure he was dreaming.

Until the voice from the other end of the line spoke. “Hey, Brendon.”


End file.
